I know I need to work on my issues but I don’t know how and no matter how hard I try, I keep falling. Hi. You can sign in to vote the answer. I, too, used to be a victim of the I Love You- But I Think I'll Push You Away with all of my Worries- Syndrome. It's bad to answer a question with a question, let alone three, but here are a few things to consider: do you worry about other things in your life the same way? The energy you send out into the universe is the energy you get back. I know this might sound weird, but my boyfriend seriously says the words 'I love you' too too too too much lately. In a way, I want him to see this post, just like I saw his. He is my first proper relationship (I'm in my early 20's) and my first proper love. You won’t be happy in the relationship, and he won’t be happy either. He began to make more smalltalk with me and we had little conversations about different topics. theatre and I are there already. it is stupid and sometimes its better just to shut up rather than talk about what bothers you especially when those things do not bother them. grrrrr Copyright 2006 - 2021. i think the best thing is to think positive and believe him when he says he loves you because if he never meant it you woudn't have spent three yaers with him. You got: It Seems You May Worry Too Much. 3 years ago. Why can't i control these thoughts? Someone is NOT always right or wrong. Lv 7. Photography by Peter Arnell. ? :). I do not know how to stop thinking this way. This is a common mistake. I love when I get that random text during one of those off days that just says those three words. I told him multiple time how I felt about it and those times have always been fights. Do You Worry Too Much? I don't know you personally, but I'll offer up some questions that I asked myself. So relax, calm down, and think positive! . My boyfriend pays out 1,000 dollars a month for 2 kid and I don’t agree with the child support laws that’s way to much… we are struggling and I to am doing all the cooking, cleaning and I’m looking for a second job so therefore I feel the same way ….. He may be a great guy, but he’d make a terrible boyfriend. I've been with my boyfriend nearly 10 months. Is this a recent development, or has it been this way all four years? Are you trying to make sure he’s not having too much fun without you? products, or services. Anxiety meds. first of all, thanks for a great answer to my question. Join Yahoo Answers and get 100 points today. We can call ourselves clingy, but we shouldn’t call someone else clingy. In other words, fill your life up with all kinds of good things so that neither of you feels smothered by the relationship. he has exes that he talks with still and none with his kids,,also he has a ex common law who has 3 boys,,he wants to see them,and im fine with this but he talks to her in secret,,doesnt know i know what hes doing,,he asked her not to call the house but his cell only because he told her i dont think its cool,his friendship etc with her..tonight as we were walking i said im supportive of the boys and him but i would not stand for his doing something with her and them and leaving me out,,he said,if he did nothig would happen,he and her and i said thats not the point,i dont think its right and i would walk out on us,that he needs to respect our relationship,,i dont think he would cheat,but i dont think its right to go out with her and leave me at home either.,whats everyones view on this,,he says i worrrry for nothing that he doesnt have feelings for her,he never calls boys just her and talks about them,and his excuse hes not ready to just call them its been almost two yrs they broke up,,his reasoning hes not they,re dad,,i said look we can do things with kids,you dont need her involved in outings. i know ive been anal about and insecure about what i look like. It isn’t an easy challenge but who said challenges were easy? Because if it's not, it can become a problem. I don’t want this to damage our relationship because we have something special. Trying to control your own worry is like trying to stop a hurricane. that means he loves u . So many that it is hard to keep up with them all, especially when texting. The only way to stop worrying about everything is to figure out WHY you're so worried. My boyfriend always says I worry to much, so I thought posting this would give me the strength I need to humbly allow waheguru to do all the stressing for me. I find nothing! He's such a good person and I don't want to mess this up. think wisely if he wanted to leave u he would have done it earlier . He fails to turn in homework because he "doesn't feel like doing it" or because it's "too late and he needs his sleep." lol i watched the video,,that was good thanks for posting it,. 3 years ago. We knew each other IRL, but our entire eight-year relationship exists in our phones. You may have hooked yourself a good one. You are very insecure. Go out and rediscover yourself and your old hobbies and friends! Jamie Grill/ Getty Images While your level of anxiety doesn't appear to be diagnosable as an anxiety disorder (though you can talk to a doctor to be sure), you do worry too much, and probably cause yourself an undue amount of stress because of it. Discover new ones! I get the same from my boyfriend. He won’t let her grow up! Still have questions? If it's there, it should be dealt with. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. LOVE YOURSELF BEFORE YOU CAN LOVE ANYONE ELSE!!! I felt disrespected each time! I also did my 30 situps. Which is it? If you ask, am I texting too much, then you already likely know the answer. All content posted on this site is the responsibility of the party posting such content. what is he really saying when you want to address problems and he always says this to you.. sometimes things dont need discussing. Have you changed into "another person" since being with this man? Most of all, though, I would (re)discover your own spiritual path or re-examine the way you are practicing your current one. How can I make my partner believe that you can not overuse the ‘I love you’ term. Good sign! MEN!! champion Brayden Smith dies at 24, Amid outcry, former Iowa coach lasts only 1 day in NFL, Truck driver miraculously survives 70-foot plunge, Natalie Portman opens up about past 'Lolita' character, This LeBron move may be worst flop of NBA season. Just moved in together and I feel so unappreciated ? Relevance. This goes both ways. Many people still have feelings of LOVE after time, but can hardly stand being in the same room together because they don't really LIKE eachother's company. We have … If ever I worry for an instant about things that I shouldn't be worrying about anyway, I just turn to my friends, hobbies and my spiritual beliefs. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. I notice a reaction that I experience regularly when he goes and does something really fun .. and I'm stuck at work. Content should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. What happened? They know more about "why" they worry too much - but they still worry too much! im in a pretty rocky relationship at the moment with someone i find extremely attractive. My boyfriend’s female friend is too close, and that makes me very uncomfortable. let it relax . A boyfriend who thinks his girlfriend cries too much, a guy who thinks his gay friends have too much PDA, and a son playing violent video games at a friends house. In a divorce, should a mom who lost all custody get less equity of the house because she did a bad job of caring for the kids? He is wonderful to me and always tried to make me happy- but I always feel that he is up to no good. next, don't pay attention to the people saying, "just don't worry.". Not every single thing needs to be discussed unless it could potential be a deal breaker in the relationship. You’ll get upset with him and feel bad about yourself, too. I don't find my husband  attractive  anymore  don't know what to do  ? how do i sorp. No relationship is perfect. I can't give you any insight into whether or not they are, not knowing the entire situation, but you should consider the possibility that you really are over-thinking things. but suddenly I just got into some problems and I've been getting hurt a lot and my life is on stake and other stuff. Is it possible that you really want this to end, and that desire is manifesting itself as a "fear" of that result? Is it weird to go to marriage/couples counseling if there’s nothing wrong with the relationship? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BxckAMaTDc. It doesn't help much when he says I think too much. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. It doesn't help much when he says I think too much. My [20F] boyfriend [19M] worries too much in our relationship and I'm worried it's going to damage us. He says she is very important to him. For instance, if your boyfriend is stressed and depressed because he lost his business and has to wait tables for a living, then maybe daily texts and phone calls are too much to ask. 3 years ago. 1. My ex- worried a lot about us, and, well, you know what happened there. Cognitive Behavioral therapists suggest that anxiety is the result of mistaken thoughts and beliefs about yourself and the world around you, and offer ways of noticing, and correcting, these "errors of thinking". lol simply put its a different phrase of what hes saying. If I had a boyfriend who told me he needed space, I would feel the same! There's meetup.com that can put you in touch with many people who share all of your different interests! If they are really just friends, both your boyfriend and his friend should show you respect. My boyfriend has this behavior that you mention in the article , we peacefully talked about it even i hurt a lot when he start flirting in front of me with other girls and forgot that im there .My boyfriend said he has a lack of attention from woman when he was young ( he is 46 now ) , I understand he need to complete his journey to fill this part of his life . Is it normal to worry so much about a perfectly good relationship? Been living together for 3 + years I am having trouble letting go of the past. It's just that he is so much smarter that I am. Asking too much, or too little, can leave you on shaky ground. 0 0. ash. he is with me 24/7. Mine does this too. I like hearing him say it, I like saying it back and seeing the smile it brings on his face. Then he started to text me daily (usually in the evening) and we’d talk again for a few hours. My boyfriend of 4 years says he loves me yet I'm pushing him away by always thinking something is wrong with us - I love him so much but I worry something might happen and he may want to break up with me or that something might happen which would make me want to break up with him! In my case, I developed a crush on a friend who I’ve known for 4 years. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship. But lately I've had to hear and say it like at least 20-30 times a day [or maybe more]. Good luck! We have been together for 8 months and things have been great so far. Recently, my boyfriend has seemed a bit off with me, I asked him about it and he said I'm too affectionate. why are u hampering ur brain ?????? New district attorney starts circling Trump and his allies, Biden on Trump acquittal: 'Democracy is fragile', 'Jeopardy!' If your boyfriend suddenly won't show you affection when the three of you are together, there probably is a problem. In another post you mentioned kids yet in this post it sounds like he's just hanging out with other women. It's a vicious circle!! For my friend and millions like her, worry is a sign of love. So first of all, these kind of judgements have no place in intimate relationships. choko_canyon. I guess learn to pick and choose your battles. Four years is a long time and maybe you feel ready to commit, but he is not showing any signs of being ready, and that might be why you are worrying. Too much worry can even be deadly. Someone does NOT always have to be mad, upset, yelling, or crying. Doncha hate that? You start there, figure out the reasons, and work to undo the habit. Get your answers by asking now. And each time I bring this up, we fight. These 19 items may tell whether a sense of emotional entitlement will spell doom … I really love him and need advice. They have known each other for over 10 years now, and he spends so much money on her. Worrying doesn't always deserve such a bad rap. He meets you only at certain times of the week as per his convenience. We were never really close and didn’t talk too much to each other, until recently. Many women think that you have to have some kind of DRAMA in a relationship if it's a REAL relationship. Maybe he needs time and space to sort out his life. Or because two emotionally mature people simply grew apart?