In future, remember that the name of the game is reciprocation: when one party shows a signal of interest, the other reciprocates. If you’ve stretched the ‘playing hard to get’ thing for too long, she will surely lose her patience and cool and will no longer respond to your hints and games. Dating is a game of give-and-take, and if she’s playing hard to get, she knows that. Do you like people playing games with you? Due to constant game playing you will never be able to bare yourself as a person to her. Long time no see. You’ll run out of ways to keep her waiting and she’ll run out of patience. I'll forget about it, and pursue some one that's genuinely interested in me. This information could save lives. That's what playing hard to get is… a game. Here’s what you should do when a girl is playing hard to get. It won’t be fun for long. There's two probable scenarios here. Yes, it may keep a man interested for a little while but that’s it. Worth one message laying out the game you were playing and saying you're done with that now. His takeaway is that you weren't interested in him. don't play games next time,. More Articles --> Modern Rogue. Its understandable that you wouldn't wait around for that one girl to figure out what she wants. Make sure she’s genuinely playing hard to get, not just really busy. And next time, quit playing these immature junior high girl games. Sure, when a girl is playing hard to get and it’s too much for you, you have an option to give up and find another girl who wouldn’t play hard to get with you. Update: Elise- Soooo, what happened? It sounds more sincere. While women do like men who are not an easy prize, they don’t like to be played with for too long. Tell him you really like him and hope he can give you another chance to show him you are interested. Your friends gave you very immature advice. The problem with playing hard to get is that it backfires sometimes. And while some guys like chasing women (same as some women do - I spent a long time wishing someone would chase me for once and then a couple of guys did and I went 'woah, nope, don't like this!' Awful Pranks That Backfired So Hard, They Made The News. Playing Hard to Get – Why it Will Backfire. Either his friends tell him the same thing or he has moved on. Playing hard to get is a bad and immature move. This means that even when you will get together after all, she won’t be able to make you as happy as you were expecting. Some guys love the chase and the challenge of winning you. There's nothing more unattractive than a woman playing hard to get (at least for me). I'm a teacher. Sometimes it takes a few dates before a guy knows if he likes a girl, hard to get or not, he wouldn't blatantly ignore you? Women aren’t the only ones who play that dating game. My mother used to advise me when I was a little girl to not be too easy a catch for the guys … If he's still interested he'll respond. There's no way yo can make both happy, unless you plan to date both of them which you already said you can't. One is that he respected the signals you gave him, i.e., that you're not really interested, and decided not to waste your time. he's probably just not interested. I have heard this theory so many times and it just doesn’t make any sense to me, “men want women who are hard to get”. Yes, I think it's very possible that he interpreted you being distant as a sign that you weren't interested. Whatever your friends say? C'mon don't be coy. He said he really likes me and wants to date me. Use these tips, tricks and proven strategies to help you bridge the gap and figure out once and for all whether or not this girl is worth your time. And what's more is that you honestly deserve that kind of person. There's plenty of women he can date who are more than willing to pursue a relationship with him that won't resort to manipulation and scheming. Here are top five reasons why playing hard to get could backfire on you. But then, if he doesn't reply, you have your answer so should move on. I want to say, that if a woman plays hard to get, I assume she IS hard to get. You're young, you're a guy, and you want to date. It might seem fun initially but soon it’ll become tiring and exhausting for both you and her. If you date someone who deliberately plays mind games, don’t be surprised when you get a … After all, why bother investing your time, energy, and money, pursuing a girl or a woman who’s giving you a tough time, and may not … Is he playing hard to get? Here are some signs she likes you but is playing hard tog et. Chalk this one up as a lesson and move on. Admitting to playing stupid games? Those men reported liking the actress less, as well as being less motivated to pursue her, when she played hard to get. Your friends read The Rules, didn't they? I'd tell him that's exactly what you were doing though and apologize. Tell him you're sorry for the way you acted, etc and that you'd like another chance to show him who you really are. Acting duplicitously in an effort to manipulate how you feel? If he is playing hard to get and then you play hard to get back and neither one of you budges, this could go on for a while. I really do like him I just dont know what I should do? he's done with you. Playing games like that with people is harsh and unecessary. It's childish, stupid and wastes everyone's time. Dating blogs and forums are full of advice why you should play hard to get and how it can make you the most prized possession for your woman. 0 1. Unfortunately, at this point there's nothing you can do that won't make him think less of you. The best case scenario is that you are misinterpreting her shyness as playing hard to get. For me, it totally backfired and I wish I’d never bothered trying it. I wouldn't play the game. Even better, call him. How can I show him that I really do want to be with him and that it was all an act. This is a video where we explain how playing hard to get especially in a relationship can backfire. If she's taking her sweet time to get back to you, it's one of the biggest signs for how to tell if a girl is playing hard to get. By teens, I meant your immature childish friends. There's literally nothing you can do to guarantee that, because the other person always gets a say in whether it happens or not. Here are some signs she likes you but is playing hard tog et. Apologize for being distant and say you had personal issues that were causing you to not be considerate towards him. They would have otherwise, for sure. If he's playing hard to get, you're ignoring the signs that he's not right for you, and at the end of the day, the joke's on you. 7 Ways to Stay on Your Girlfriend's Mind All The Time, 5 Body Language Signs that a Girl is Attracted to You. You already messaged him, there isn't much more you can do. ! She doesn’t want to say yes right away to everything you propose and agree every time you want to hang out because she is scared that this way she’ll show her eagerness to see you and to spend time with you. Not trying to scare you, but when I notice a woman is playing this game I stop talking to her. When a girl is playing hard to get, it’s truly hard to figure out whether or not she really does like you or she’s just playing around. You played hard to get and you won that game! I begin by discussing what leads to a girl playing hard to get because girls don’t JUST play hard to get… there’s a reason and it’s not merely about trying to get into her pants. This is what you get for playing games with people. You want a guy that wants to be with you as much as you want to be with him. Playing hard to get is really juvenile, sorry OP. I really like this guy and it seemed that he was quite interested in me too. Playing hard to get is a flirtatious, natural, fun, sometimes difficult and intimidating course of attack. It's very possible that he assumed you weren't interested, and/or has already moved on. “You will feel insecure and give off energy in a way that people may not want to engage with you,” explains Anna Goldstein, business and life coach in New York City. It is a technique to get a man around you all the time. You're getting advice from people on "how to get him back", but I suggest instead focusing on who you actually are, and whether you have any character to you. “Be more concerned about what you’re thinking than what others think about you,” says Goldstein. Would you like people playing games with you. Honestly if he ignored your text then it has nothing to do with you "playing hard to get".. it seems like he's genuinely not interested in you anymore. Just so you don't have to wonder "what if" etc. Ask him for a date. Why on earth would you think this is a good idea? ... Outlaws Playing Cards. So she won’t flake on you completely without giving you something to hang onto. You could perhaps call him like a normal adult. Playing hard to get *can* backfire. He's most likely looking for a wife or something long term. Before getting to know about how to play hard to get, first know about playing hard. The other is that he suspected you were playing an idiotic game, has at least a modicum of self-respect, and decided not to waste his time. Be an adult and honest with people you like and want to spend time with FFS! On the other hand, playing hard to get backfired with the men who had been sent off to the speed date with no say in their date. Send him a nice txt or email. Next, I get to the meat of this article – the signs a girl is playing hard to get or how to know if a girl is playing hard to get. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Think before you take peoples advice. Favourite answer. Stop playing games. If some girl tried this crap on me, I'll never talk to her again. TL:DR - tried to be a smart ass and played hard to get, drove him away possibly. Now the thing with wondering is he playing hard to get is that sometimes it can be difficult to tell the difference between that and him genuinely not being interested in you. Also, most dating advice are bad and do more harm then good. Do share this article with friends on Facebook and Twitter. Playing hard to get can sometimes work when it comes to getting a guy’s attention, or so I’ve heard. The reason, simply put: Trying too hard creeps out your colleagues. ... you will realize that the whole "playing hard to get" mindset will get you nowhere when it comes to being in a serious relationship with someone. 9 Answers. Playing hard to get backfired with one important exception: the men were more motivated to pursue the woman who played hard to get but, and this is a big but, only if they had chosen her from the set of photographs in the first place. Well, I can tell you that this is a myth! At parties he's all over me and desperate to kiss me but I don't kiss him because he has a girlfriend. If he says no, at least you know. You could try asking him out on a date. lessons learned. Apologize to him, but be prepared that he may have already moved on. But the reality today is entirely different. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. The other girl was playing hard to get, she expected you to wait around for her. It's a common fallacy in dating as you can see from the story in the link below... answer to I just met this guy. Only children, and the VERY stupid, play relationship games. 1. So as I said earlier, the best move in this game is honesty. For me, it totally backfired and I wish I’d never bothered trying it. Nah. While you might be playing the most intelligent hard to get games, chances are that you will end up getting nothing of her. Playing the hard-to-get game is harmful when you actually want to invest in a relationship with someone. The least you can do is apologize to him. Why would he waste his time with someone who shuns him? There's this guy (let's call him Alex) who I know likes me and we have chemistry, we've known each other a few months but are not close. That's what happens when you're 28 years old listening to teenagers. Maybe he's just not that into you... Or it's possible he recognized the game you were playing and doesn't want any part in that. Yeah. If he is interested, he will be impressed. It is immature and irritating. However, it’s easy to mistake being busy for “playing hard to get”. 7 years ago. (Because: just not interested? This "texting hi" a week later.... and being uninterested all the while he treats you with the utmost respect? 1. Frequently one student will come to me complaining that another student is chasing him or her. it always ends up in a better relationship that's guaranteed to turn long term. Sometimes men like to see you chase them. Press J to jump to the feed. It's childish, dude is in his 30s, he's not looking for that. Then why would you do it to someone else? I played hard to get and it backfired, HELP, now she thinks I'm not interested? But there’s no need to feel negative. Facebook 0 Twitter Reddit Tumblr Pinterest 0 0 Likes. Period. It's very possible that he assumed you weren't interested, and/or has already moved on. Playing hard to get signs aren’t always clear to everyone. We seek posts from users who have specific and personal relationship quandaries that other redditors can help them try to solve. did I drive him away from my silly move?? She won’t get to know what kind of a person you are and what are your likes and dislikes. 1 decade ago. "Some guys might, but for most, it's a really, really terrible strategy. And when your long-term relationship needs some housekeeping, start with the 50 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Fresh. /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. I think playing hard to get is the worst thing a girl OR a guy can do. If he wanted this level of immaturity he would date a chick in college. I much prefer taking the lead, albeit in a hopelessly nerdy slowcoach/fits and starts sort of way) simply having to chase you isn't enough to make a guy who isn't already interested, become interested. One day my friend told me I should play hard to get make he want me more but this plan backfired and now I hardly ever speak to him and when I do see him he acts as if I'm not there. You’ll run out of ways to keep her waiting and she’ll run out of patience. Nope. Enjoy!! I don't think it has anything to do with you - unless you were genuinely rude, disrespectful or cold on said date. I took advice from my stupid friends and they told me that if you make him work for your affection, it always ends up in a better relationship that's guaranteed to turn long term.. when he puts in effort to make u open to him.... or so they said. I tried this with this guy I met recently at a convention (related to my work) and we had a few dates and I really liked him, but I tried to do it as my friends said and acted like I wasn't sooo interested (even though I was falling deep inside), and played down his advances towards me... he didn't push too hard and was very polite & a gentleman... anyway its been almost a week now since our last date and he hasnt texted me or called me... i texted once saying Hi and what he's up to... but no reply , and I have no idea how else to get in touch with him... did I drive him away from my silly move?? Photo Courtesy: 4774344sean ©crestock.com. I told him I don't have any special feeling for him yet, and it is too fast. This might sound like a no-brainer advice. Women, has playing "hard to get" ever backfired on you? Don't play games with people like that. And if he's into you he'll respond regardless so his actions are telling you how he feels I think. Cookies help us deliver our Services. At least you learned that your friends are shitty at relationship advice. You already messaged him, there isn't much more you can do. Knowing what kind of person you are is critical to developing any kind of relationship, so do some introspection before you brace dating some more. Well, no hard feelings. It might seem fun initially but soon it’ll become tiring and exhausting for both you and her. Then if he gives you another chance, don't mess it up. Relevance. Here are top five reasons why playing hard to get could backfire on you. The trouble is that every guy is different. Playing hard to get may seem pointless, but it's not. Not worth his time.). I regret this so much, he was so wonderful! Sorry .. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the relationships community. It's so mean. Answer Save. Playing hard to get often means making the other person wait, even when it personally pains you to do so. Deliberately playing hard to get is a sign of immaturity, so you should be wary. If he doesn't respond, at least you tried. Speak up and ask him if he’s interested. Though guys may get frustrated with this play hard situation, eventually they all enjoy it as being a challenging phase to get a woman. Also you’ll miss all the opportunities when you could spend some quality time with her and have some carefree fun. Jen. Lv 7. AskReddit dating games Heart Catalog Love & Dating Love & Relationships Love & Sex modern dating Playing hard to get r/AskMen Reddit The Chase If you are hurting, this guided journal is for you. Playing hard to get is a bad and immature move. One of the signs a girl likes you but is playing hard to get is her reaction to you inviting her out on a date or just to hang out. Update 2: Ello- What's up buttercup. It's highly likely, yes. 7 0. latintuch112. When done correctly, it gives the relationship a bit of extra excitement. "The friend zone and playing hard to get are the same thing. Other guys have very little patience for the chase. Anyway he has a girlfriend and this is why things have not happened between us. You're not in high school! And I never heard a man play hard to get." So if you're playing hard to get with a guy who doesn't have the stomach for those kinds of games, it could backfire on you. He doesn't really care what happens, but you do. And even if it did, that wouldn't ensure the relationship was good/better than if you guys just went with what comes naturally to you as individuals. Ladies- Has playing "hard to get" ever backfired on you?
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